Overwhelmed

19 Feb

My life has been very overwhelming lately. It’s in my genes to get overwhelmed easily and I can’t seem to help it!
In hopes of prioritizing and listing everything in the name of organization, here is a list of what I need to accomplish.

  • Finish assembling rings – I probably only have 10 left but Neely NEVER lets me sit in the chair and do the rings, she cries and whines on my leg if I even go near the table. So it has to get done when/if Brett is home. UPDATE: Finished all of them today 2/20!
  • Purchase garland supplies for Neely’s party – I haven’t purchased a THING. I am starting to get stressed because I plan on hand making a LOT and haven’t done anything yet.
  • Purchase owl cookie cutter and get started on cookies – I want to make cookies ahead of time and freeze them so that I’m not stressed the week of her party.
  • Finalize invitations (send them out on 2.25) – that won’t take long, I just have to fill out the vital information, buy envelopes and get everyone’s address.
  • Figure out how I’m getting to Vegas the weekend before Neely’s birthday – It is my bff’s 30th and I’m going to Vegas for one day. . . I’m not sure if I can/should fly or should drive. And I have to make sure I have a chunk of Neely’s party stuff done by then or I’ll never be able to relax!
  • Begin a commissioned painting (finish by 2.26) – that clearly takes non-baby time. Brett has offered to watch her if I can let him know ahead of time. I hope that I can do it! UPDATE: Finished it today, 2/21!
  • Fold laundry – it seems silly but in the dryer alone is 4 loads waiting to be folded. And the rest of the laundry is dirty and in need of a good wash.
  • RUN – I haven’t gone running since I got sick 2 weeks ago. I need to get on it. Sadly, my goal of doing a 5k in March will not be realized; the 5k I was going to sign up to do is March 6th. I can barely run 2 miles without wanting to die so a 5k is out of the question.
  • Do all other party tasks – that is a huge list in itself. I started making a list the other day and it was over a page long. I hate that I’m alone here and am doing it all on my own!! I do have one friend who offered to help me assemble things and whatever else I need. And Lulu is doing things from Vegas and so is my mom. So I guess I’m not completely alone! I’m actually not good at asking for help! My mom is coming almost a week early (YAAAAAAAAAAY!!!) so that will help me a LOT but I want to have most things completed so that I can enjoy Neely on her actual birthday.
  • Go to church – that seems so easy for everyone but it isn’t for me. In fact, nothing that requires me to commit to it is easy for me. It’s a little known fact that I have a form of social anxiety. Before almost all social events I panic and get stressed and consider canceling. I usually do cancel or look for an excuse not to attend. Once I’m in a social situation I am fine but beforehand is terrible. I’m talking Xanax-inducing panic. It’s crazy. My chest gets tight and I have intense thoughts. Are all shy people like this? And until I just wrote about it in this paragraph, I’ve never really talked about it to anyone other than Brett, my mom and Lauren. So if I’ve ever bailed on you (and it wasn’t because Neely was sick) that is why. I have gotten a lot better but I still suck. More on this later. ANYWAY.
  • Buy camera – this is happening while I’m in Vegas. This is why I’m doing the painting and this is why I’m assembling rings. I am also going to sell my stuffed owls (who wants to buy one??). I need MONEY!! I also need to take Neely’s one year picture. When she’s closer to a year old.
  • Make more owls – I can’t sell owls if I can’t make any! And clearly this is a Neely-less activity.
  • Above all, take care of Neely – and that obviously trumps everything else.

I’m sure I left some things out but that’s enough for now! And sorry if this list seems complainy at all. It’s not my intention to be passive-aggressive or a complainer. As my mom said, “my head is barely above water.” If we’re real life friends and I haven’t talked to you or hung out with you lately, please give me some grace and love! :) Okay, enough blogging, my crazy cute baby is in need of attention! :)

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5 Responses to “Overwhelmed”

  1. Kelly V 02/19/2011 at 10:55 am #

    Very interesting post – lots to comment about here, but I myself am also trying to keep my head above water and not feel too overwhelmed. It’s so stressful being a mom and trying to do anything (and everything) outside of that. Know that you are not alone, and there will be good days and bad days. But most importantly, Neely will grow up knowing she is loved, and she won’t give a hoot about there being four loads of laundry waiting to be folded in the dryer.

    • Sarah 02/21/2011 at 3:03 pm #

      Thank you…that’s true!

  2. Steph 02/19/2011 at 9:50 pm #

    Hey Sarah….I agree, lots of intesting things to comment about. I’m particularly interested about your anxiety because I too have suffered from it. I was on medicine for a few years and suffered from panic attacks and, well, anxiety just sucks. I would love to hear more about what you’re dealing with, if you ever decide to blog about it.
    Have you considered scaling back at all on the party plans, in case you can’t do it all? Just a thought! You’re way ahead of me in terms of party planning. I haven’t even started!

    • Sarah 02/21/2011 at 3:03 pm #

      My mom gave me a few suggestions that may make the party less insane. I still haven’t purchased a THING though!

  3. Jo 02/21/2011 at 6:47 pm #

    If we can help you in any way let us know. We can run errands, help you set everything for the party (we gotta get invited though =D), babysit Neely, keep you accountable to church attendance haha. Whatever we can do to help, you don’t have to do all of it alone, you have a church family!

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