Speed of Light

21 Sep

It has been overcast here by the beach for a couple days. Right now it’s 4:30pm and 64 degrees. I am happy that fall is slowly making it’s way here.
When the weather is gloomy it makes me nostalgic.
Lately I find myself thinking about Neely growing up. She has done so much growing in the last (almost) 6 months, it blows my mind.
She sits up, laughs, smiles, scoots backward, rolls, coughs, yells, cries, drools, eats cereal and veggies, puts food in her mouth, smiles when she hears her daddy’s voice, splashes in the bath, has a favorite YouTube video that makes her laugh, loves bouncing and being flown through the air, pulls herself halfway up while holding onto things, loves her mama, and generally brings joy to everyone who sees her.
And it’s happening too fast.
I know she’ll be crawling within the month and after that, everything will happen at the speed of light.
I will never have this time with her again.
This morning after I let the dogs out, I let them sleep in bed with me while Neely was still asleep. I was looking at Sinatra as he lay on my chest and remembering when I was pregnant and could just stay in bed as long as I wanted to with him. I’ll never have those moments back.
Neely will soon be cutting teeth and saying her first words and growing growing growing.
It’s all very exciting but also scary. I want to be able to cherish each and every second with her.
This is why I take no less than twenty pictures of her a day. This is why I have no desire to leave her with a babysitter so I can have “me” time. She is me. She is half of my heart, the other half being Brett.
I want to breathe in these moments as a young family in and never exhale. I want to remember the sweet chaos that is my life with an infant. I never want to forget her baby soft skin or the way she smells after taking a bath.
Because all too soon she’ll be too old for me to cover her face in kisses and she’ll be going on her first date.
Then I’ll blink and she’ll be getting married.
My memory is bad these days so I try to take photos and videos as much as possible. I want proof that my life was and is this amazing.
I miss her when she sleeps and when I’m in the other room.
I hope when she’s older she realizes that the sun rises and sets in her eyes.
That she is our world.
That I could never dream of anyone so perfect.
That I love her so much it breaks my heart.
(who am I that God gifted me with such an angel?)
God is so good, you guys.
So good.

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7 Responses to “Speed of Light”

  1. La Vonda 09/21/2010 at 7:01 pm #

    awww….That is beautiful, what a special mama Neely is blessed with :).

  2. GG 09/21/2010 at 8:36 pm #

    I think I am going to come and cover your beautiful face in kisses just to prove you are never too old for your mama to smother you with love!

  3. Brett 09/21/2010 at 11:21 pm #

    We are lucky to have you. This blog made me feel so sentimental. I LOVE how you love Neely and I think you are an amazing, perfect example that every new mother to learn from!

  4. Jen 09/22/2010 at 5:25 am #

    You so get it-I am bawling….because that is so my heart. God is so good!!! It’s true- it’s like a speed of light!

  5. Cindie Vertefeuille 09/22/2010 at 9:02 am #

    My sweet Sarah – your children are NEVER too old to cover their faces in kisses! Ask my grownup babies – they still get those.
    I remember that smell. I used to be convinced that you could line up 100 babies, blindfold me, and I could pick out my baby just from the sweet smell of her head.
    I love that you are cherishing this time and are raising her. There is no more important job IN THE WORLD.

  6. Kelly Vasami 09/23/2010 at 5:49 pm #

    What a loved and cherished little girl she is! God must have known how bad you wanted this little girl and how much she would be appreciated to have granted you this most precious gift. And what joy He must take in seeing you fully appreciate this gift you’ve been given. As a mom, it is such a hard job and some days it’s so difficult to just get through the day. Your words are an inspiration and an example of positivity. You are all so blessed!

  7. ihilani 09/25/2010 at 1:20 pm #

    oh my gosh I’m fully crying! don’t you wish you could just pause time? i do.

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